PIGGY!
by CrowsGurl
Summary: So what happens when you mix two best mates, total suclusion, a robot babysitter, a nearly unlimited supply of beer and a PIGGY! Heheh, let's see, shall we? Plastic Beach. 2D/Muds. Oneshot.


2D and Murdoc were currently sitting on the floor in the study, beer cans littering the floor around them and the scent of alcohol strong on their breath. Cyborg came in every now and then to check and make sure they weren't doing anything life threatening, but otherwise left the two to themselves.

"S-so ya know w-wot she said ta me?" 2D leaned forward, one eye squinted more then the other as he looked at the bassist.

"Wot'd she say?" Their words were slurred with alcohol, but that didn't dampen their good time one bit.

"'wradish!" The singer slapped his knee and both erupted in laughter.

"No way! No bloody way!" Murdoc shouted through his laughter.

"I know, w'ight?"

Cyborg's head appeared above the desk as she peered over at the two. She rolled her eyes, smiling slightly at the antics of the drunken men. At least they were behaving this time. Last time hadn't ended so well...

_She stepped out onto the beach, having followed the trail of beer cans. "Master Niccals? Master Stuart? Are you two out here?" Cyborg called as she glanced around. _

_ There was a mixture of screaming and laughing and she was quick to run to the edge of the water. Muds and 2D were sitting in the water up to their chins, laughing until the waves knocked their drunken selves backward in the water. They'd come up sputtering and screaming only to go back to their joyous giggling when they regained thier breath._

_ Sighing, she waded out into the water and lead the two back by thier wrists like a mother about to scold her children. _

Turning, the robotic girl disapeared out the door again. 2D peeked around the desk, whispering that it was safe. "She's gone, i's'ok now."

"D-did yew know wot sh-she was tryin ta do?" Murdoc's eyes squeezed shut then opened wide as he stared at the other.

"Wot?"

"K-KISS ME!" He yelled, falling backwards into a pile of cans. 2D gasped overdramatically then giggled.

"Heheheh! Cyb'og looooooves yew!"

Murdoc's words were so slurred that not even he was sure what he answered.

"Hey, hey, hey, Muds!"

"Eh?" He sat up part-way, leaning on his elbows and looking at the vocalist with a half-open eye.

"Wot would y-yew do if she did kiss yew?"

"Nuuu!" He yelled, letting his head lol back.

"Hahaha! Mkay, ok, ok, mkay, wot if Russ kissed yew?" 2D giggled, poking the bassist's stomach.

"I-I would shove 'im offa cliff!"

"Noooooodle?"

"Ffft, tell'er ta pick on someone 'er own size!" The keyboardist laughed loudly, poking his stomach again.

"Wot if IIIIII kissed yew?" He asked through his giggles.

"I would k-kill yeeeew!" Murdoc shouted, laughing as Stu poked at his stomach with both hands.

"Nu-uh!"

"Uh-huh!"

"I b-" 2D belched loudly, only making the two laugh harder. "I bet yew wouldn'!"

"I bet I would!" Murdoc pressed his finger right into the middle of 2D's forehead.

"P'woooove it!"

"Then kiss me!"

"Fine then!"

"Then do it!"

"Maybe I will!"

At this the singer went to move towards the bassist, but his hand landed in a puddle of beer and he slipped, landing face down on the other's stomach. "Yew' tummy smells funny!" He giggled as he scooted himself up a bit.

"Yeah, well... well... you' face smells funny!" Murdoc countered drunkly, half-glaring at the singer that was perched on top of him.

2D leaned down, kissing the other for a second before sitting back up and looking around. "Dun' tell Mu'doc I deeed 'at cause he's gonna kiiiiill meeeee." He whispered, giggling slightly.

"I-I'll kill yew if, if, if yew kiss me again!" Murdoc threatened, his head rolling to the side as a seagull crashed into the window.

"Nu-uh!" Stu leaned over, kissing him again. This time he didn't back out right away, instead leaning on his elbows which were on either side of the Satanist's head. Murdoc's lips tasted strongly of alcohol, making the singer lick at them.

"Ffff- wot'e yew doin?" Murdoc growled, pushing the other back a bit. "Yew j-jus' slobe'ed all ove' meh mouth."

"Heheh, yew taste like b-bee'." 2D chimed, rubbing at his own mouth.

Muds licked his own lips and laughed. "Sa do yeeeew."

The singer scrunched up his face, making an odd noise then laughing. "I'ma PIGGY!"

"O-M-G-NO-WAY!"

2D laughed. "GUESS WOT!"

"WOT?"

"Piggy gunna kisss yeeeew!"

"Nuuuuu!"

"PIGGY!"

"YESSSSS!"

Stu resumed licking the other's bottom lip, enjoying the taste of alcohol. Murdoc parted his lips and 2D found himself running his tongue across jagged teeth instead. Giggling slightly, he rammed his tongue into Murdoc's. Murdoc huffed into his mouth, slamming his snake-like tongue into 2D's intruding one.

Not giving up, 2D continued to fight back. A few seconds later he found the other's tongue slipping in the gap between his front teeth, playing along the inside of his cheeks and teeth. The singer tried to bite his tongue but found it impossible with his teeth missing.

"No faaaiiii'." He whined, sitting back with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. Murdoc's hung limply from his own mouth as he frowned up at the other.

"Is too fai'! S'not my fault yew aint got you' front teeth!"

"Yes it is!"

"Nyah!" Murdoc huffed, grabbing his collar and jerking him back down. They continued to duel, 2D still trying to bite Murdoc's tongue and Muds trying to force the other into submission. Neither was really sure how long this battle continued until Cyborg came prancing back in to check on them.

She walked around the edge of the desk and stopped, looking down at the two with a raised eyebrow and smirk. 2D was lying on top of Muds, each pulling at the others' hair and totally involved in their little 'kissing war'. Taking out her cell phone Murdoc had given her for emergencies (namely for him to call her) and snapped a few pictures.

It was times like this she knew she'd be able to get the best black mail material-and backgrounds for her cell-which is why she never says 'no' to them drinking. The babysitting was deffinently worth it.

Stu finally sat back, panting. He looked up at the camera, both with their tongues hanging out, hands in their hair and the thinner straddeling Muds. Cyborg snapped a final picture, smiling down at the two. "Ok, well, I'll be back later. Continue." With that the smiling robotic girl turned and walked off.

"...told yew she was tryin' ta kiss me.."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"PIGGYYYY!" 2D giggled, resuming where they'd left off.


End file.
